After two months at home, I have returned to Brazil! It’s so nice to be back here.
I live in a different part of the city than before and praise God, I am able to walk to my school. My mom helped me to organize my room and get all settled here so I can just focus on school. My classes are going well. There are times when I think, “How in the world am I going to speak this language?” and then moments when I remember God’s Spirit is greater than my knowledge or understanding.
Last week, I was having some feelings of disappointment. I felt disappointed in myself for not doing more, like the people in the bible. I shared this with my mom and she reminded me how God had spoken to me only to come to this country for a year and study the language. She said, “If you do more than what He has instructed you to do right now, you will be outside of His perfect will. You can only do what He’s asked you to do.”
She’s right.
“Jesus gave them this answer: “Very truly I tell you, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does.”
John 5:19
At the moment, I am learning Portuguese. This is His command and it’s what I will do until He says something else. I’m waiting on God. I don’t know what will come next, but I know He is with me.
Although, on Sunday, God surprised me. There was a girl sitting in front of me at church and I couldn’t shake the overwhelming feeling of God’s love for her. The Lord wanted me to share this with her and I did, and I told her how special she was to God, and some other things God was showing me about her. The amazing thing about it is that I said this entire message in Portuguese.
I went home and was writing about it in my journal and when I realized that God spoke through me in Portuguese to bless someone here, I started to weep. It’s not the first time God has spoken through me in Portuguese, but every time it happens I am in awe that God is answering my prayer. I still remember the trip a few years ago when I came to Brazil and barely could speak. I remember feeling God’s love for people and having no words to tell them what He was showing me. I remember this year, on this last trip, and how frustrated I became because I felt useless as I tried to understand and speak and failed over and over again. O how I prayed, “Please Jesus, help me to know this language to speak to your people!”
God seemed to use me despite my shortcomings, but I thought about how much more useful I could be if I only I was fluent.
Then on Sunday, this miracle happen. God spoke a message through me in Portuguese. Even though, I’m not fluent, and I don’t know all the grammar, He used what I had. Even to know I can speak more now than I used to, I praise God.
I have hope!
There’s a reason Jesus and I are here on this adventure. It’s a time of preparation, but even now, God is glorified in my weakness. This little shy California girl in Brazil and she is speaking Portuguese to strangers?! Oh yes. It’s only through God.
Studying this language feels like sewing seeds. It’s a lot of hard work, takes time, but one day the harvest will come from the seeds. I don’t know when or how but one thing I know about God is He is a farmer. He knows the seasons, when it’s time to sow and when it’s time to reap.
One day, I’m going to know Portuguese so well I’m going to be able to preach in this language!
I believe with all my heart because God said it. I’m not going to master Portuguese because I’m super smart and languages come easy to me. Not at all! It’s because God is faithful and He is with me. It’s because God said to me, “Daughter, I want you to go to Brazil for one year and learn Portuguese.” Friends, if He has told me to do it, He will give me grace as I learn, He will encourage me when I feel like giving up, and He will supernaturally speak when I can’t remember the words.
I have hope because God is with me in this journey.
Ah, but did I mention it’s a lot of work? 🙂
Fifteen hours a week of Portuguese, friends. Oh Lord help me! But it’s amazing to know that God is not reliant on our natural abilities for Him to use us. He can use us despite ourselves! Praise God. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be here.
I pray you would continue to do what God has asked of you to do, nothing more and nothing less. I pray you wouldn’t compare yourselves to others (or biblical characters haha) but would find joy in your journey with Jesus. I pray you would know God loves you, you are wonderfully made, and that God has a plan and purpose for you even if you don’t see it yet.
Be encouraged. There is hope!
Till the next adventure,
The Seed Planter
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
Jeremiah 29:11
